I Loved Her First
by My Quiet Riot
Summary: Raj Mansingh's thoughts and feelings as he watches Natara marry Mal. 'From the first breath she breathed, when she first smiled at me, I knew the love of a father runs deep.' One-shot.


**Hi, guys! So I just wrapped up _Crashing In_, and I'll be starting its sequel soon, too. But for now, I wanted to write this songfic one-shot. There's some Maltara, but a lot of it is father-daughter things. I'm pretty much in love with this song (I Loved Her First by Heartland), and it's the song I want played at my wedding for the father-daughter dance. C: I'll do review replies for the last chapter of _Crashing In_ when I write the first chapter of the sequel._  
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**Anyways, enjoy, and please let me know what you think. I've never done anything like this before, so I'd love some feedback. Thank you!**

* * *

I Loved Her First (one-shot)

I walked down the aisle of the polished white church we had rented, arm-in-arm with my eldest daughter, Natara.

Today was her wedding day. Today I would give her away to Malachi Charles Fallon.

Though it was a bittersweet day, I was glad it was Mal she was marrying. I could see by the glowing light in her eyes that she was truly in love with him, and he with her. I knew he would treat her well, like she deserved to be treated. The first time we did this, that light wasn't there in her eyes. She had on a glowing smile, of course, but the spirited light that I had always loved was not there. Not for her, anyways. Though I didn't have a doubt that Oscar would treat her well, she wouldn't have been truly happy with him.

My thoughts were interrupted as we reached the stairs leading up to the pulpit. She turned to face me as the music continued to play, looking up at me with a radiant smile. Tears glistened in both of our eyes as she hugged me. I hugged her back, savoring the moment. My beautiful little girl was growing up,getting married to the man of her dreams. As she pulled away, I slowly let go of her hand, allowing her to walk up the steps as I took my seat next to my own wife, Anita. She slid her hand into mind as I sat down, and we both directed our full attention to our daughter and soon-to-be son-in-law.

After the traditional opening of the ceremony, it was time for the vows.

"Malachi and Natara have requested to say their own vows," the priest stated clearly. "Malachi, please proceed first." Mal nodded as he pulled a white piece of paper from somewhere inside his suit. He held the paper with one hand and Natara's hand with the other. They smiled at each other as Mal began.

"I still remember the first time we met, Natara. Out on that dock by Fisherman's Wharf. I jokingly asked if I could call you 'Nat', and you just glared at me. From that moment on, I knew there was something special about you. I didn't know it would lead up to this day, but I'm _so_ unbelievably glad it did. Since that day on the dock, we've grown closer than just partners, and I'll always be thankful for that. You caught me when I was just about to fall, Nat. You were there when nobody else was, and you helped set me back on my feet again. You made me laugh when I didn't even think I could smile, and you made me want to be a better man. You're beautiful, funny and so smart it's almost scary; but most importantly, you're my best friend. I'm so lucky to be able to work side-by-side with you every day. Not only are you an amazing partner, but you're also an amazing person, inside and out. Even my dad approved of you, and I know mom would've, too. You completely turned my life around, and I'll always remember that. Natara Mansingh Williams, I love you more than words could tell, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, until death do us part."

Mal carefully folded the paper back up and put it back inside his suit. Natara smiled up at him with tears shimmering in her eyes and a broad smile on her face.

"Natara, you may now say your vows," the priest declared. Natara nodded and reached into a hidden pocket on the side of her dress. She extracted a white paper as well and carefully unfolded it. She mimicked Mal's actions, holding the paper in one hand and Mal's hand with the other.

"When I met you on the dock that day, Mal, I was in a dark place. I was confused, scared and hurt, and I wanted nothing to do with love. When you came along, I couldn't deny that I was immediately attracted to you, and that scared me. I was terrified of love, and I was terrified of getting hurt. Throughout the few years we've been partners, our friendship has grown into so much more. As our relationship grew, you slowly helped me believe that I was indeed worthy of love. You taught me how to love, and you've never left my side. You accepted me as I was, insecurities and all; you were willing to look past my flaws just to get to know me; you kept reaching out even when I pushed you away; you believed in me when nobody else did, and you loved me when I couldn't even love myself. Above all that, though, I got the chance to get to know you; and I thank you so much for giving me that chance. You're handsome, charming and hilarious, and even on my worst days, you always manage to make me laugh. I love you, Mal Fallon, more than you'll ever know; and I want to be by your side for the rest of my life. You're my best friend, and I love you so much."

Natara finished her vows and tucked the paper away again. They joined hands again, gazing into each other's eyes with such a fiery passion, that I felt tears in my own.

"Then do you, Mal, take Natara to be your lawfully wedded wife?" the priest asked.

"I do," Mal vowed, smiling ear-to-ear.

"And do you, Natara, take Mal to be your lawfully wedded husband?" he continued.

"I do," Natara promised with a shining smile.

"Then by the powers vested in me by the state of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Mal, you may now kiss the bride."

With that, they both leaned forward and passionately kissed as the congregation applauded.

* * *

An hour later, I stood on the edge of the hardwood dance floor, silently surveying the scene. The substantial ballroom was elegantly adorned in white and gold. Large bouquets of pure white lilies, scented candles and shiny silverware arrangements decorated the tables. Gold-colored streamers were twisted along the walls and up the tall, white columns lining the room. People milled around everywhere, chatting, laughing and dancing as they pleased. Across the room, Natara stood smiling and talking to another handful of relatives and friends. Mal stood a few feet away, talking to whom I presumed to be some relative of his. The shiny material of Natara's long, white dress shimmered in the light and trailed behind her when she walked. Her hair was pulled up in an intricate bun-type thing that seemingly only women knew how to accomplish. Though she didn't need any at all, her make-up was done extra-carefully, perfectly highlighting the gold designs sewed on her dress.

Suddenly, the lights in the room dimmed down, leaving only a bright spotlight focused on the center of the floor. I quietly observed as Mal led Natara onto the dance floor. They strode to the middle of the spotlight as everyone else cleared off, making way for the bride and groom. Music began playing as someone announced their first dance as a married couple.

_Look at the two of you dancing that way;  
Lost in the moment and each other's face._  
_So much in love, you're alone in this place_  
_Like there's nobody else in the world._

The slow, peaceful notes of the song carried on as I watched Mal and Natara slowly dancing, eyes locked on each other. Even from my distance at the edge of the floor, I could see the love and passion that burned in their eyes. They seemed to be oblivious to everyone else, completely lost in their own world of love. Huge smiles were plastered on both of their faces, and a smile crept onto my face just from watching them.

_I was enough for her not long ago.  
__I was her number one; she told me so._

I couldn't help the twinge of bittersweet sadness from creeping in, though. It seemed like just the other day, that I was the only man in her life. I still remembered her as a gleeful little kid, looking up at me from three feet tall. She would always ask me to read or play with her, holding up books or stuffed horses for me. I could never seem to get enough of her joyful little laugh or the gleam in her brown eyes that looked so much like her mother's.

_And she still means the world to me, j__ust so you know,  
So be careful when you hold my girl._

Our relationship had faltered in her young adult years, and I admit that was mostly my fault; but none of that made me love her any less. She was my firstborn daughter, and she meant the world to me.

_Time changes everything, life must go on;  
__And I'm not gonna stand in your way._

I allowed myself to think back and regret all the years I had spent essentially shunning her. I hate that I did that to her, and a part of me will never forgive myself for it. I knew she forgave me, but I couldn't help but still regret it. With time came change, though, and life had to go on. My little girl was growing up, whether I liked it or not.

_But I loved her first, and I held her first;  
__And a place in my heart will always be hers._

No matter how old she or I got, I would never forget holding her for the very first time. I loved her before she was even born, and I would never forget the sight of her sparkling hazel eyes looking up at me. No matter where the rest of life took us, there would always be a special place in my heart for her. Nobody else could ever fill that place; it was all hers.

_From the first breath she breathed,_  
_When she first smiled at me,  
__I knew the love of a father runs deep._

When I first heard her heartbeat at the ultrasound, I knew that being a father would be one of the best things I'd ever do in my life. The moment I first held her was completely unforgettable. Nothing could change the love I had for either of my daughters; my family meant the world to me, and nothing, not even time, could erase that.

_And I prayed that she'd find you someday,  
__But it's still hard to give her away.  
I loved her first. _

I always knew she would find someone someday; she had everything going for her. There was never a doubt in my mind, even during the years I pushed her away, that she would find someone to settle down with. As glad as I was that Mal was the man I was giving her to, it was still hard to watch my daughter grow up.

As the song ended, I knew what was coming next. With a smile on her face, my eldest daughter approached me, stopping a couple feet in front of me. She seemed almost uneasy, and I knew why. Despite her gracious forgiveness, I knew I still had not made up for the years I had lost by estranging her. I would never be able to really make them up, but I was never going to stop loving her.

As she looked up to meet my gaze, I smiled at her, taking her hand in mine. I led her onto the middle of the dance floor as a familiar song began playing. It was the one we had decided on for the father-daughter dance. I took her hand with one, and put my other hand on her hip. Her other arm rested lightly around my neck. We began to dance as the notes to _'I Loved Her First'_ by _Heartland_ drifted through the room.

_How could that beautiful woman with you  
__Be the same freckle-face kid that I knew?_

"You look beautiful," I whispered to her.

"Thank you," she murmured back with a smile.

"It doesn't seem like that long ago that you were half my height," I continued quietly. "I can't believe you're the same little girl with braces I knew growing up." She smiled at me and laughed, cheeks flushed slightly in embarrassment.

_The one that I read all those fairy tales to,  
__And tucked into bed all those nights._

"I still remember all the times you begged me to read to you," I recalled. Something flashed in her eyes, and I knew she remembered, too.

"_Cinderella_ was my favorite," she mumbled with a smile.

"I know. I'm pretty sure I know that story by heart now," I added with a laugh. She laughed, too, seemingly lost in thought for a moment.

_And I knew the first time I saw you with her,  
__It was only a matter of time. _

"You know," I started after a couple seconds of silence between us, "The first time I saw you and Mal together, I knew it was only a matter of time before you two fell head-over-heels in love with each other."

"Ugh," she laughed with feigned annoyance, "It seems like everybody saw us coming except... well, us." I said nothing, but gave her a look that said I agreed.

_But I loved her first, and I held her first;  
__And a place in my heart will always be hers.  
__From the first breath she breathed,_  
_When she first smiled at me,  
__I knew the love of a father runs deep._

"Holding you for the first time was undoubtedly one of the happiest moments of my life," I reminisced. "And watching you hold Neha for the first time... your face just lit up like Christmas lights, braces and all."

She laughed again, and her face flushed darker.

"I remember that," she replied softly. "I was so excited I had a sister instead of a brother."

"I know you were," I said with a smile.

___From the first breath she breathed,_  
_When she first smiled at me,  
__I knew the love of a father runs deep.  
__Someday you might know what I'm going through  
__When a miracle smiles up at you.  
I loved her first._

As the song ended, I pulled her into a hug as everyone around us clapped. I led her off the dance floor as the lights returned to their normal brightness.

"I love you," I murmured, reaching out and placing my hand on her cheek.

"I love you, too," she replied. She reached up and placed her hand over mine. After a few moments, she dropped her hand and I dropped mine; but she lingered there, as if silently hoping I would say something more. She looked down and bit her lip. As she started to turn away, I knew what I had to do.

"Natara," I began gently, gaining her attention, "I know this is nothing I can say that will make up for the years I pushed you away, but I want you to know how proud of you I am. I didn't tell you that enough when you were growing up, and I'm so sorry for that. But now I know that you made the right choice. You're amazing at what you do, and I wouldn't want you to do anything different. You met Mal through your line of work, and from the first time I saw you together, I knew you two would work out. I can see the light in your eyes when you're near him, or even when you talk about him. That's what I've always wanted for you. You've grown up to be a beautiful young woman, inside and out, and I'm so proud of you for standing up for yourself."

She stood still and stared at me for a moment, a hint of shock written on her face. A moment later, though, she broke out into a smile and pulled me into an embrace. I happily hugged her back. As she pulled away, fresh tears glistened in her eyes as she smiled up at me.

"Thank you," she choked almost inaudibly. "You have no idea how long I've waited to hear that."

"I know," I replied, "And that's my fault. I'm sor-"

"Don't," she interrupted. "You don't have to apologize, dad. It's okay." I nodded and smiled at her, and she smiled back.

"I love you," she added.

"I love you, too."


End file.
